Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize