it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
