addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize
