wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize