please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
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