That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize