Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
