it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Randomize
