Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Randomize
