Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize
