Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
Randomize
