I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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