john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
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