There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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