Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Randomize
