my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
