mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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