Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
