I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Randomize
