apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Randomize
