East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
