So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
Of course I have a pirate flag
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize
