I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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