Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(713): View more from Texas

we have officially lost it.

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(904): View more from Florida

What are you doing tonight?

(847): View more from Illinois

Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.

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(720): View more from Colorado

So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.

(970): View more from Colorado

well, dont

(720): View more from Colorado

I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.

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25 People Confess The Most Awkward Situation They’ve Ever Been In
Read it at the TFLN blog
(412): View more from Pennsylvania

words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.

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(917): View more from New York City

found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him

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(212): View more from New York

I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?

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(773): View more from Illinois

im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me

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(224): View more from Illinois

Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.

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