google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
I am naked and annoyed.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
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