he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
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