You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Randomize
