Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Randomize
