never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
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