After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
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