Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I love you. Go after that dick
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Randomize
