I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
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