Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Randomize
