...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
