i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
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