We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize