You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
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