Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
Randomize
