if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Randomize
