i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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