i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
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