too bad you live with your parents still
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Randomize
