We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Randomize