i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize
