I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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