I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
