"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
