Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
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