just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
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