I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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