what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Randomize
